A journalist and author's musings on love, marriage, divorce and life
Posted in Beta marriage, Divorce, Expectations, Happiness, Marital plan, Marriage, Relationships, Romantic relationships, Women on Dec 12th, 2017
I am a champion of short-term love. That is how I have lived my entire life although, granted, I did say, “I do” twice with the presumption that those marriages would be forever. That’s all I knew, that was the romantic script; I didn’t know that we had choices. But we do. I have long […]
Posted in Children, Consensual nonmonogamy, Expectations, Family, Live Apart Together, Love, Marriage, Midlife, Needs, Parenting, Relationships, Romantic relationships, Sex on Dec 5th, 2017
It’s December, beginning of engagement season. So if you’ve already gotten a ring, or hoping to get one this month, there’s just one thing left to do after you’re told your loved ones and friends, and posted your bling on Facebook and Instagram. No, not start planning your wedding — start planning your marriage. First […]
Posted in Caregiving, Children, Expectations, Infidelity, Marriage, Men, Mothers, Needs, Relationships, Sex, Wife, Women on Nov 21st, 2017
Your spouse had an affair — can that benefit your marriage? According to renowned therapist Esther Perel’s new book The State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity, maybe. Perel explores a lot in her book — much more than I can address here — but I was particularly drawn to her exploration of why more women are […]
Posted in Caregiving, Children, Cohabitation, Expectations, Family, Love, Marriage, Parenting, Relationships, Single parents on Nov 14th, 2017
Do we need marriage? The answer might be Iceland. For much of history, marriage mattered. It was a way to make sure property could be passed to heirs, alliances could be forged (often to avoid wars), children could be reared, society could be assured that caregiving would be taken care of and a lot of […]
Posted in Caregiving, Children, Consensual nonmonogamy, Expectations, Family, Happiness, Marriage, Needs, Parenting, Relationships, Sex on Oct 31st, 2017
The recent release of the movie Professor Marston and the Wonder Women has been heralded as “a trailblazer for polyamory in film” for depicting a polyamorous arrangement in a positive light. But the story, based on the lives of William Moulton Marston, the creator of Wonder Woman, his wife, Elizabeth, and his — and their […]
Posted in Coupledom, Dating, Expectations, Marriage, Millennials, Needs, Relationships, Romantic relationships, Sex, Singles on Oct 17th, 2017
You’re single, let’s say by choice not chance, and you have a full, happy life. There’s only one thing missing — sex. How do you get it? This was a question posed on a private singles group moderated by social scientist Bella DePaulo, author of Singled Out: How Singles Are Stereotyped, Stigmatized, and Ignored, and […]
Posted in Coupledom, Divorce, Expectations, Friends, Happiness, Heartbreak, Marital plan, Marriage, Needs, Relationships, Renewable marriage, Romantic relationships, Women on Sep 26th, 2017
When Anna Faris and Chris Pratt announced their separation, fans were crushed — it certainly one of those oft-repeated celebrity “love is dead moments.” The couple, who had been married since 2009 and have a 5-year-old son, seemed to be a great fit. So then, what happened? Life happened. While we can never know the […]
Posted in Expectations, Friends, Happiness, Marriage, Needs, Relationships, Romantic relationships on Sep 12th, 2017
Should your spouse be your everything and fulfill all your needs — be your best friend; passionate lover; devoted parent; soul mate; great communicator; romantic, and intellectual and professional equal who provides you with happiness, fulfillment, financial stability, intimacy, social status, fidelity … ? That’s what marriage has become, as my co-author and I detail […]
Posted in Dating, Expectations, Happiness, Love, Marriage, Men, Relationships, Sex, Singles, Women on Sep 5th, 2017
It’s an old saying but most of us have heard it — “Why buy the cow when you can have the milk for free?” That’s a phrase that’s both dated and sexist, so to hear it re-branded as “cheap sex” — aka casual sex — and purported to be the reason men aren’t committing and […]
Posted in Consensual nonmonogamy, Expectations, Happiness, Love, Marriage, Relationships, Renewable marriage on Aug 29th, 2017
“For life. No one wants anything ‘for life.’ It just reminds us of our impending death.” So starts Lake Bell’s new movie, “I Do … Until I Don’t,” which explores the sorry state of marriage and the promise of a seven-year marital contract. I was incredible excited to learn about this film — its premise […]
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