A journalist and author's musings on love, marriage, divorce and life
Posted in Expectations, Men, Relationships, Wife, Women on Nov 8th, 2016
It’s a familiar story — a talented but tortured man, consumed by drugs or booze or demons or womanizing or all of the above, is told by his woman: “It’s me or your partying.” And just like that, he cleans up his act and starts putting her and their family first. Then they live happily […]
Posted in Consensual nonmonogamy, Divorce, Expectations, Infidelity, Marriage, Men, Relationships, Sex, Wife on Oct 25th, 2016
When I interviewed Eric Anderson, an American sociologist at England’s University of Winchester, a few years ago, when his provocative book, The Monogamy Gap: Men, Love, and the Reality of Cheating, was published, I was disturbed by his claim that cheating is a rational choice for people constrained by the social dictate of monogamy. According […]
Posted in Children, Expectations, Family, Fathers, Infidelity, Men, Mothers, Relationships, Sex on Oct 18th, 2016
There you are, finally pregnant, getting the nursery ready and looking forward to your new role as Mom and — bam, your husband cheats on you. Wonderful. At least that’s what happened to Katie Price, one of the stars of the British daytime TV show Loose Women. Not only did hubby Kieran Hayler cheat on […]
Posted in Coupledom, Dating, Expectations, Love, Marriage, Men, Relationships, Sex on Sep 13th, 2016
I am not a fan of the self-help industry nor of most so-called relationship “experts.” Whenever people start spewing what someone should or shouldn’t do, I get nervous. Who can tell us what’s right or wrong for us? That said, some people often make sense in sharing their stories of their missteps and what they […]
Posted in Aging, Caregiving, Children, Expectations, Family, Marital plan, Relationships, Women on Jul 26th, 2016
You’ve consciously coupled. You and your spouse discussed everything from money to sex to children to in-laws to household chores. Maybe you even read The New I Do (hey, an author can dream, right?). I applaud you and support you. Still, I’ll bet there’s something you didn’t discuss, and it’s not because you’re oblivious. You’re […]
Posted in Cohabitation, Coupledom, Divorce, Expectations, Love, Marriage, Men, Relationships, Singles, Stereotypes, Women on Jun 21st, 2016
The cover of a recent Time magazine declared, “How to stay married (and why).” As you probably know, I am not against marriage or for it either despite the fact that I co-wrote a book about marriage. OK, yes, my co-author and I did say in the book that we were for marriage, but — […]
Posted in Caregiving, Children, Coupledom, Expectations, Family, Gender, Love, Marriage, Mothers, Relationships, Wife, Work on Jun 14th, 2016
A few years ago a woman wrote to me out of the blue. She had been reading this blog and saw me as a woman who “got” it. What did I get? The right for women invest in their own life and not put a husband’s needs and wants over hers. A successful business- woman […]
Posted in Expectations, Infidelity, Marriage, Men, Relationships, Stereotypes on May 24th, 2016
Years ago, I was a cliche — I was the Other Woman. I was in my 20s and working with someone whom I liked as a coworker and whom I found attractive. I don’t recall how the conversation started, but somehow he convinced me that he and his wife were only staying together until their […]
Posted in Caregiving, Children, Family, Men, Mothers, Parenting, Relationships, Single parents, Women on Apr 26th, 2016
We’re coming up on Mother’s Day, and that means the “mother as hero” rhetoric typically heats up. I have the utmost respect and compassion for parents. As a mom, a single divorced mom, I know how hard a job parenting is. It’s harder than anything I have ever done and probably ever will do. That […]
Posted in Caregiving, Children, Expectations, Fathers, Midlife, Mothers, Parenting, Relationships, Women on Apr 19th, 2016
I was standing in line at the grocery store this weekend when I watched a paramedic truck and a fire truck pull up to the front. In hurried about five men, and I watched as they began talking and administering to a boy, around 13- to 15-years-old, who was seated at the front of the […]
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