A journalist and author's musings on love, marriage, divorce and life
Posted in Divorce, Expectations, Infidelity, Relationships, Romantic relationships, Sex on Oct 8th, 2019
No matter what kind of punishment society puts on people’s sexual lives, they are most likely still going to risk it.
Posted in Consensual nonmonogamy, Expectations, Infidelity, Love, Marriage, Needs, Relationships, Sex, Women on Sep 18th, 2018
For many years everything I read and heard, and thus believed, is that women aren’t good at casual sex, only have affairs for love, eventually become disinterested in sex and do best in monogamous relationships. OK, but my lived experience proved otherwise. True, I’ve been a serial monogamist, which I interpret as being pretty good […]
Posted in Aging, Children, Divorce, Expectations, Family, Happiness, Heartbreak, Infidelity, Marriage, Mothers, Politics, Relationships on Sep 4th, 2018
This past week, the country mourned for U.S. Sen. John McCain, who died Aug. 25 at age 81. He was lauded by Barack Obama, Joe Biden and others as a hero, a friend, a voice of reason, an “extraordinary man.” While I didn’t necessarily agree with McCain’s politics, I agree that he was a man […]
Posted in Expectations, Happiness, Infidelity, Love, Marriage, Relationships, Romantic relationships, Sex on Aug 7th, 2018
“What is it that stops young women from having as much sexual agency as they should have, which includes being able to say no when you want to and yes when you want to?” Laura Kipnis told me when I interviewed her not long after her book, Unwanted Advances: Sexual Paranoia Comes to Campus was […]
Posted in Aging, Caregiving, Divorce, Expectations, Happiness, Infidelity, Marital plan, Marriage, Men, Midlife, Millennials, Needs, Parenting, Relationship contract, Relationships, Romantic relationships, Women on Jul 31st, 2018
While divorce isn’t nearly the 50 percent of all marriages we’ve been lead to believe, there’s one group that has seen the rate of divorce skyrocket — boomers, or those aged 50 and older, aka gray divorce. OK, great, but if you’re not a boomer, does it even matter? Well, yeah. Because even if you’re […]
Posted in Expectations, Heartbreak, Infidelity, Love, Marriage, Relationships, Sex on Jun 19th, 2018
They were crazy in love in the beginning, but in the past few years, we’ve learned a lot more about Beyoncé and Jay-Z’s marriage, from Beyoncé’s allegations of Jay-Z’s infidelities in her 2016 album Lemonade to Jay-Z’s confession and remorse in his 2017 album 4:44, which seemingly led to a reconciliation not long after Beyoncé […]
Posted in Children, Expectations, Family, Infidelity, Love, Marriage, Men, Mothers, Relationships, Sex, Women on Jan 30th, 2018
You’re pregnant with your first child. Can’t speak what that’s like for a man but for a woman who has maybe wanted to be a mom for a long time, and who sometimes wondered if that was going to happen, it’s a wonderful, scary, exhausting, overwhelming thing. I’m sure it was for Melania Trump, too, […]
Posted in Caregiving, Children, Expectations, Infidelity, Marriage, Men, Mothers, Needs, Relationships, Sex, Wife, Women on Nov 21st, 2017
Your spouse had an affair — can that benefit your marriage? According to renowned therapist Esther Perel’s new book The State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity, maybe. Perel explores a lot in her book — much more than I can address here — but I was particularly drawn to her exploration of why more women are […]
Posted in Children, Consensual nonmonogamy, Expectations, Family, Infidelity, Marriage, Relationships, Sex on Jul 4th, 2017
Jay-Z just released his latest album, 4:44, and it’s gathering the same buzz as the last record put out by his wife, Beyoncé — not just for the music, but because of what they’re talking about. In last year’s Lemonade, Beyoncé alluded to her husband’s alleged infidelity — remember that video showing Beyoncé’s sister Solange physically […]
Posted in Consensual nonmonogamy, Expectations, Infidelity, Relationships, Sex on May 23rd, 2017
“Is an open marriage a happier marriage,” a recent New York Times magazine cover story written by Susan Dominus asked. With a headline and topic like that, of course it went viral — as if no one ever considered that consensual nonmonogamy has existed for decades and, yes, it might actually be a good thing […]
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