A journalist and author's musings on love, marriage, divorce and life
Posted in Divorce, Expectations, Fathers, Marriage, Men, Mothers, Parenting, Relationships, Sex, Singles on May 28th, 2013
I was at a party, the kind where bosoms, booze and mouths overflowed. There wasn’t much happening with my bosom, but my then-husband’s mouth was going for it. “You know,” he said to my dearest friend, “I like being married but living like I’m single.” When she shared that with me the next day we […]
Posted in Divorce, Expectations, Marriage, Relationships on May 20th, 2013
Why are so many people unhappy in their relationship? That’s a hard question to answer, although that doesn’t stop people from trying to figure it out. According to Dana Adam Shapiro’s research for his book You Can Be Right (or You Can Be Married), very few married people are happy — he says about 17 […]
Posted in Children, Dating, Divorce, Expectations on May 6th, 2013
Like many others, I applauded Jason Collins’ brave decision to come out as gay. I can’t imagine what it would be like to hide my true identity for 12 years, as the the NBA veteran did. As broad-minded and accepting as many of us have become, many are still not as accepting of LGBT people […]
Posted in Expectations, Family, Marriage, Stereotypes, Work on Apr 29th, 2013
I didn’t know much about Marco, the guy who kindly takes me to and from my mechanic and my job when my car needs servicing. I knew he is in the States legally, I knew he worked about 70 hours a week at two jobs, I knew he had a wife and a 9-year-old son […]
Posted in Divorce, Expectations, Family, Marriage, Men, Women on Apr 15th, 2013
There’s an image we have about marriage, about “two becoming one.” Anyone who’s been married for length of time realizes that’s a bit of a lie. We’re still people with our own needs. In fact, many believe what we experience is a “his” and a “her” marriage. Some 50 years ago, sociologist Jessie Bernard noted […]
Posted in Divorce, Expectations, Infidelity, Marriage, Sex, Stereotypes on Apr 8th, 2013
Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith have been in the headlines a lot in recent years, and not because of their movies. They’re either on the verge of divorce or they have an open marriage; I’m not sure which horrifies people more. I can understand why people might be concerned about them divorcing; they have […]
Posted in Dating, Expectations, Marriage, Men, Midlife, Singles, Women on Mar 11th, 2013
As some of you know, Susan Pease Gadoua and I are co-writing The New I Do: Reshaping Marriage for Skeptics, Realists and Rebels (and just snagged a literary agent, so things are really looking promising!) While it’s essential to talk about reinventing marriage to get the marriage you want, here’s an interesting question to ask […]
Posted in Children, Expectations, Marriage on Feb 25th, 2013
“How would your marriage be different if you had been handed an honest, comprehensive guide on what to expect after the wedding?” That’s the question Sheryl Paul asks in her article “Premarital Wisdom: The Truth About Marriage” in the Huffington Post Weddings section this week. On the surface that sounds like a cool thing. Really, […]
Posted in Children, Divorce, Expectations, Marriage on Jan 30th, 2013
I’ve been reading the blogs and writings of other divorcees for some time now and one thing is clear — not all divorcees are created equal. Some still seem so bitter and angry at their former spouse; they’re still pointing fingers at him even if they’re many years past into their divorce. Am I the […]
Posted in Family, Infidelity, Marriage, Sex, Stereotypes on Jan 22nd, 2013
At yesterday’s inaugural speech, President Obama strongly hinted that he may endorse marriage for gays and lesbians as an equal right under the Constitution: “Our journey is not complete until our gay brothers and sisters are treated like anyone else under the law, for if we are truly created equal, then surely the love we […]
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