A journalist and author's musings on love, marriage, divorce and life
Posted in Aging, Children, Divorce, Expectations, Happiness, Love, Marriage, Midlife, Needs, Relationships, Romantic relationships on May 15th, 2018
If your marriage makes it to the 20th year — when you’re likely at midlife — you’ll either be the happiest you’ve been in your marriage, according to a new study, or you’ll be heading to divorce court, as so many 50 and older people have been doing in recent years, either happily — if […]
Posted in Aging, Children, Divorce, Expectations, Family, Marriage, Midlife, Relationships on Apr 10th, 2018
Across the globe, fewer women are having babies, sometimes by chance — whether the lack of a romantic partner or fertility issues — but often by choice. While childfree couples tend to divorce more, I wondered if childfree couples tend to split early in the marriage or later — the typical midlife crisis years or, […]
Posted in Divorce, Expectations, Family, Marriage, Midlife, Relationships on Feb 6th, 2018
When my marriage was falling apart, my former husband and I went to marital counselors to help us. The first one was useless. The second one patiently listened to our story, one that included infidelity — how common! — and keep saying, “OK, but let’s talk about the drinking.” My former husband didn’t want to […]
Posted in Children, Consensual nonmonogamy, Expectations, Family, Live Apart Together, Love, Marriage, Midlife, Needs, Parenting, Relationships, Romantic relationships, Sex on Dec 5th, 2017
It’s December, beginning of engagement season. So if you’ve already gotten a ring, or hoping to get one this month, there’s just one thing left to do after you’re told your loved ones and friends, and posted your bling on Facebook and Instagram. No, not start planning your wedding — start planning your marriage. First […]
Posted in Divorce, Expectations, Marriage, Men, Midlife, Relationships on May 30th, 2017
I’ve been married and divorced twice, but when I divorced the first time — in my 20s, with no children — I never paid attention to any articles about reinventing myself as a divorcee. Not to say that there weren’t articles about that; perhaps there were but this was in the days before the internet […]
Posted in Expectations, Live Apart Together, Marriage, Midlife, Relationships on Mar 21st, 2017
The secret to a happy marriage may mean living apart together in separate master suites, a recent Wall Street Journal article declared. Not everyone lives in a “4,700 square-foot Tudor home” or wants to, but without a doubt, more people, especially older people (like — *sigh* — me) are interested in having a room — […]
Posted in Children, Divorce, Expectations, Marital plan, Midlife, Relationships on Mar 7th, 2017
We’re approaching the time of year when high school seniors start getting acceptance letters from colleges and universities, a nerve-wracking time for sure. But increasingly, seniors are taking a year off before starting high school, known as a gap year — most famously of late Malia Obama. Research has shown that teens who take a […]
Posted in Caregiving, Children, Expectations, Fathers, Midlife, Mothers, Parenting, Relationships, Women on Apr 19th, 2016
I was standing in line at the grocery store this weekend when I watched a paramedic truck and a fire truck pull up to the front. In hurried about five men, and I watched as they began talking and administering to a boy, around 13- to 15-years-old, who was seated at the front of the […]
Posted in Aging, Expectations, Gender, Midlife, Relationships, Stereotypes, Wife, Women, Work on Jan 26th, 2016
Women are more depressed and anxious than men. Why? Because we don’t make as much money as men do, researchers say. According to the study: among women whose income was lower than their male counterparts, the odds of major depression were nearly two-and-a-half times higher, and odds of anxiety were more than four times higher, […]
Posted in Dating, Divorce, Expectations, Love, Midlife, Relationships, Sex, Women on Jan 5th, 2016
We all “know” that women aren’t good at casual sex, “only” have affairs for love, are biologically disinterested in sex, and that, more so than men, “need” and thrive in a monogamous relationship. Maybe that’s been your experience, maybe not. Maybe you believe it, maybe you don’t. But have you ever questioned if this is […]
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