A journalist and author's musings on love, marriage, divorce and life
Posted in Aging, Caregiving, Children, Expectations, Family, Marital plan, Relationships, Women on Jul 26th, 2016
You’ve consciously coupled. You and your spouse discussed everything from money to sex to children to in-laws to household chores. Maybe you even read The New I Do (hey, an author can dream, right?). I applaud you and support you. Still, I’ll bet there’s something you didn’t discuss, and it’s not because you’re oblivious. You’re […]
Posted in Consensual nonmonogamy, Expectations, Love, Marital plan, Marriage, Relationships on Jul 19th, 2016
Recently, an old Modern Love piece appeared in my social media feed. It was about consensual non-monogamy so of course I had to click on it. I suppose it was a popular piece, as most Modern Love essays are, but this one — “When an Open Relationship Comes at a Price” — irked me a […]
Posted in Children, Expectations, Marital plan, Marriage, Men, Millennials, Relationships, Wife, Women on Dec 1st, 2015
When I married for the first time in the ’70s, I was still young, not even 21, and admittedly clueless about what I was getting myself into. He was cute, I was cute, we loved each other, we had two dogs, a cat and a snake, and we were happy hippies living (barely, on my […]
Posted in Divorce, Expectations, Marital plan, Marriage, Midlife, Parenting, Relationships on Nov 24th, 2015
Nothing will make you think more about what marriage is about than a divorce. But there’s divorce and then there’s divorce. When I divorced in my 20s and we had nothing — no property, no savings, no kids — it was emotionally challenging, true, but that’s about it. If someone presented me a way to […]
Posted in Beta marriage, Cohabitation, Divorce, Expectations, Marital plan, Marriage, Relationships on Nov 17th, 2015
Whether or not you said “until death do us part” in your wedding vows, and an increasing number of couples don’t say it anymore, most of us believe marriage should be lifelong even if they don’t always end up that way. Of course when the words “until death” were added to the wedding vows, in […]
Posted in Expectations, Love, Marital plan, Marriage, Relationships, Weddings on Sep 29th, 2015
A month or so ago, I offered to work with a newlywed couple to create a marital plan. I got a polite, thanks but we’re just too busy and [new husband] isn’t too interested anyway. My The New I Do co-author Susan posited a similar question her friend about to marry. “Oh, we’re good,” the […]
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